From Draft Mode to Blog Post

Dear Niece9,

Forgive what I lack in brevity in this post, I'll make up for it in content. While my initial thinking was to tell you that Uncle BS and I were otherwise engaged I don't see any point in sugar-coating the reality.

We will not attend your wedding because you're a selfish, self-centered, manipulative cow. Your proven track record of calling us only when you need something has worn on me to a point that I will no longer tolerate.

The amount of energy your and your band of cousins, aunts and mother expend to exclude me when you desire, and contact me when you need something, mainly financial is no longer acceptable. Therefore I will not be able to serve your guests.

Do not call me or my husband for anything other than an apology. We will not pay for showers, babysit, write letters of recommendation, co-sign loans, or provide you any more support then you have us.

Now I'm sure you're a bit confused by the babysitting reference, as you have no children. That's simply because I've taken the liberty of copying the other 8 nieces as well as your mother and your aunts.

For the sake of limiting further communication lets just assume that your wedding card is as lost in the mail as my invitation to your "other" shower, bachelorette party, and the wedding card you so thoughtfully sent to your Uncle and I.

Minnie